Jan 25 | slcsux's Blog

Today was the worst day ever. I woke up to my alarm and checked my phone to find a message that school was closed. I then looked to see if snow care at the Y was open and it was at 8, so I went back to sleep for an extra hour. When I got up again, I looked out the window and it only looked wet, so I didn't think there would be any problems. Jo was being kind of slow and lazy again this morning, but I decided just to ignore it. This worked until I asked if she needed a belt, i didnt believe her so I looked and her jeans were falling off her butt. I told her to get a belt and she came back with an old raggedy belt. I asked where the new belt she got for Christmas was and of course she didnt know where it was. Sometimes I dont know why I get her nice things, she doesnt take care of or keep up with anything. Anyway we got in the car and there was a sheet of ice covering it, but the driveway didnt seem to be very slick. As soon as I pulled out on the road I slipped and decided to keep going and slipped again. At this point I got scared and decided to turn around and go back home. I slid half the way back home. It just wasnt worth wrecking my car. Jo was crying because she really wanted to go to snow care, I told her it was too dangerous, but she kept crying about it like a baby so i sent her in her room until she stopped. We didnt do much today, tv and games and a little cleaning, and cooking. I was really upset about missing a day of work, I really need ever hour I can get, especially since Im trying to buy a new car. So that plus the fact that tomorrow is the day we are supposed to meet the sperm enforcer really put me in a bad mood today. It was one of those days where I just thought about dieing a lot, like all day. I talked to my mom and it was ok at first until she started talking about how I need to get a husband and shit like that. I cant stand when she starts talking like that. I dont want a husband, I like and have accepted that it will always be just me. Every guy I have ever been involved with has used me for money or a place to live or sex or a car, treated me horribly, abused me menatlly, physically,  emotionally, and/or sexually. Why would I want to marry somebody and be treated that way for the rest of my life??? Nobody who is worth anything will ever like me, just assholes and Im pretty much done with that. So when she started that, I found a reason to get off the phone. I am not looking forward to tomorrow,its going to be the worst day of 2013 so far. Maybe the world will end tonight.